Script: LUCY in the Sky with Diamonds, Episode 9

EXT. PRUDENCE BURNS'S DREAM. AN ENGLISH GARDEN. 11:07 PM. JUNE 28th, 1967. In the dream, Prudence Burns is sitting picking flowers. She looks about thirty years younger. She sits very ladylike in her light blue dress on a bench. She sees THE WALRUS walk towards her, acting like a complete gentleman.

THE WALRUS
*offering its hand* Would you care to sip with me a cup of English tea, Prudence Burns?

Prudence Burns
*since it is a dream, she assumes everything is safe* Why yes! You know this is not the weirdest dream I've had. *she takes THE WALRUS'S flipper/hand thing*

THE WALRUS
*leads her to a picnic with tea and various desserts in the basket* Good to know what you think Prudence. Sit, eat whatever you want and you won't have to worry about the weight gain.

Prudence Burns
Well if you say so. *eats an éclair, surprisingly it tastes completely real* *she stuffs herself after the bite* *she realizes that it tastes completely off when she is done eating it* What kind of dream is this? Shouldn't the éclairs be better than what they are in real life?

THE WALRUS
My dear Prudence, you're being punished for your involvement in the department. You're never going to wake up because I poisoned you and sentenced you to this hell. Enjoy it while you can. *Suddenly the garden is burning and everything is distorted*

Prudence Burns
*she coughs and her body contorts in an odd shape* *She dies* *her left eye has the yellow stuff oozing out of it*

*Title Sequence plays*

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS (VOICE OVER)
Episode 9: Dear Prudence, all the lonely people, where do they all belong?

*Change of Scene*
INT.  LIVERPOOL. PRUDENCE BURNS'S HOUSE. PRUDENCE BURNS'S BEDROOM. 7:04 AM. JUNE 29th, 1967. *MUSIC IS STARTING* Prudence's corpse is contorted and the yellow stuff is still on her left eye.  RITA knocks at the door though no sound is heard. She opens the door and heads to the bed to wake up Prudence. She then realizes that Prudence is dead.

AARON ANON (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play? *RITA sobs soundlessly and she holds the corpse close to her* *LUCY enters the room and see RITA and Prudence's corpse, she cries soundlessly as well*

RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, greet the brand new day. *LUCY collapses onto the floor and sobs again only the song is heard*

INT. LIVERPOOL. RITA ELAINE BURNS'S (FORMERLY PRUDENCE BURNS'S) HOUSE. THE LIVING ROOM. LATE MORNING. JUNE 29th, 1967.

FINN MACARTHUR (VOICE OVER)
*sung* The sun is up, the sky is blue. *LUCY is in fetal position on the couch, while RITA is calling the funeral home.*

LUKE HIGHLAND (VOICE OVER)
*sung* It's beautiful and so are you.  *LUCY sobs again into the couch's pillow*

WILLIAM BELFAST (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play?  *FINN MACARTHUR arrives holding a pie and white roses. He sits beside LUCY trying to comfort her as RITA is making the arrangements*

EXT. LIVERPOOL. ST. PETER'S CHURCH. LATE AFTERNOON. JUNE 29th, 1967. It is raining and everyone is wearing black.  

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, open up your eyes. *LUCY is at the cemetery by a grave that reads "Eleanor Rigby." She leaves a white rose there*

AARON ANON (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, see the sunny skies. *It stops raining for a moment and LUCY sits on the church's front steps crying*

RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* The wind is low. The birds will sing. *A dove and a blackbird land on the metal fence that separates the cemetery*

FINN MACARTHUR (VOICE OVER)
*sung* That you are a part of everything. *LUCY buries her head into the black dress's skirt*

LUKE HIGHLAND (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, won't you open up your eyes?

WILLIAM BELFAST (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Look around, round. *The camera pans around the area*

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS, RITA ELAINE BURNS, FINN MACARTHUR, LUKE HIGHLAND, AARON ANON (VOICE OVER)
*sung whilst WILLIAM BELFAST is singing 5-part harmony* Round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round.

RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Look around, round. *camera reverse the direction of the panning*

FINN MACARTHUR, LUKE HIGHLAND, WILLIAM BELFAST, AARON ANON, LUCY SILVIA DAVIS (VOICE OVER)
*sung whilst RITA is singing 5-part harmony* Round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round, round.

THE SILVERBEATS, LUCY SILVIA DAVIS, RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung in 6 part harmony* Look around. *the camera tilts upward toward the sky*

LUKE HIGHLAND (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, let me see you smile. *pans towards the clouds again*

WILLIAM BELFAST (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, like a little child.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* The clouds will make a daisy chain. *the clouds form into a daisy chain*

AARON ANON (VOICE OVER)
*sung* So let me see you smile again.

RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, won't you let me see your smile? *the clouds form into a likeness of Prudence Burns*

FINN MACARTHUR (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play?

LUKE HIGHLAND (VOICE OVER)
*sung* Dear Prudence, greet the brand new day.

WILLIAM BELFAST (VOICE OVER)
*sung* The sun is up, the sky is blue.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS (VOICE OVER)
*sung* It's beautiful and so are you.

THE SILVER BEATS, LUCY SILVIA DAVIS, RITA ELAINE BURNS (VOICE OVER)
*sung in 6-part harmony* Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play? *the camera pans back to the ground the music fades*

*Change of Scene*
EXT. LIVERPOOL. ST. PETER'S CHURCH. LATE AFTERNOON. JUNE 29th, 1967. LUCY sits on the staircase that leads into the church, using a stick to mark an invisible rhythm. WILLIAM BELFAST parks his car in front of the church. He gets out of the car.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
*sung to the rhythm* Hold on brother, can you take me? Can you take me by the hand? Hold on brother, can you take me? Can you take me by the hand? *scats the repeated phrase* *sung* Can you take me? Can you take me? Can you take me back? Anybody can you take me? Can you take me back? Take me back to where I came from. Oh, take me back. I ain't happy here, my honey. Can you take me back? I ain't happy here, my honey. Can you take me back? Can you take me? Can you take me? Can you take me back? I ain't happy here honey, can you take me back? Can you take me back where I came from? Can you take me back? Can you take back where I came from? Can you take me back? Are you happy living here, honey? Honey are you happy living here? I ain't happy living here, baby. Honey, can you take me back? Can you take me back where I came from? Can you take me back? Can you take me back where I came from? Brother, can you take me back? Can you take back? Mm, can you take me back where I came from? Can you take me back? *stops messing around with the stick*

WILLIAM BELFAST
*applauds* First singing songs that someone else wrote and your own song. It's very good; you should probably pursue a career in music.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
*slightly embarrassed* Oh that. That was me venting out my feelings. We should probably go inside. Everyone else that was invited is already there. *stands up and walks toward the door* *she opens it*

*CHANGE OF SCENE*
INT. LIVERPOOL. ST. PETER'S CHURCH. EARLY EVENING. JUNE 29th, 1967. Everyone is deathly quiet as Father Mackenzie finishes the sermon.

Father Mackenzie (An elderly preacher)
*beat* Does anyone have something to share about the deceased?

THE WALRUS
*bursts through the door with five penguins* I have something! *everyone stares at THE WALRUS* *THE WALRUS walks down the aisle and toward to pulpit* *two penguins sit at the organ, both have anxious expressions*

Father Mackenzie
Well, okay then. *makes room for THE WALRUS and sits at a pew*

THE WALRUS
You may think that Prudence Burn's death was a simple case of an old woman dying in her sleep, but you are wrong! Her death was an act of retaliation! *The audience except for six people (The Silver Beats, LUCY SILVIA DAVIS, and RITA ELAINE BURNS) gasp in shock* But who would hold a grudge against Prudence Burns? She was an innocent member of the department! Or was she? She died because a certain Super Hero group killed a free thinking "rogue" super. So for the benefit of *pauses for dramatic effect* Mr. Kite *Again gasps from the audience* there will be a show tonight and you are all watching it now. *to the penguins* Mach schau! Mach schau! *the penguins begin playing the organ* *sung* I am he as you he as you are me and we are all together. * There is a collective "huh" had by everyone* See how they run like pigs from a gun! See how they fly! I'm crying. Sitting on a cornflake waiting for the van to come. Corporation T-shirt, *looks directly at LUCY and points* Stupid bloody Tuesday, *looks at Father Mackenzie and points* Man, you've been a naughty boy! You let your face grow long. *points to itself* I am the egg man.

The 5 Penguins
Woo!

THE WALRUS
*points to the penguins* *sung* They are the eggmen.

The 5 Penguins
Woo!

THE WALRUS
*points to itself again but with my emphasis* *sung* I am the Walrus! *does a crazy expression* *sung* Goo goo g'joob! Mister city police men sitting *looking at the Silver Beats sitting at the same pew* pretty little police men in a row! See how they fly like Lucy in the Sky! See how they run! *does this operatically* I'm crying. I'm cryyy. I'm crying. I'm cryyy. *does this normally* *sung* *looks at AARON ANON* Yellow Matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye! *looks in RITA'S direction* Crab locker fishwife, pornographic priestess *there's a shocked gasp from the audience*. *point directly at RITA* Boy, you've been a naughty girl! You've let your knickers down! *does the same gesture* I am the eggman!

The 5 Penguins
Woo!

THE WALRUS
*sung* They are the eggmen! *points to the Penguins again*

The 5 Penguins
Woo!

THE WALRUS
*sung and same gestures* I am the Walrus! Goo goo g'joob! *different tone but sung* Sitting in an English garden, waiting for the sun, when the sun don't come you get a tan from standing in the English rain! *sung without the gestures* I am the eggman! They are the eggmen. I am the Walrus! Goo goo g'joob! Expert textpert, *playfully chokes* choking smokers *normal again*, don't you think the joker laughs at you? See how they sny like pigs in a sty! See how they snide! I'm crying. Semolina Pilchard climbing up the Eiffel Tower! Elementary Penguins singing "Hare Krishna" man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allen Poe. I am the eggman! They are the eggmen! I am the Walrus! Goo goo g'joob! Goo g'joob! *on the off beats* Juba, juba, juba *repeated* *the music ends* I hope you have enjoyed my performance. *bows along with the penguins* *they leave the church/ exit scene*

Father Mackenzie
*heads back to the pulpit* Is there anyone else who wishes to speak about the deceased in a decent fashion?

RITA ELAINE BURNS
Yes! *gets out of her seat in the pew and is joined by LUKE HIGHLAND at the pulpit* We wrote this song to help my half-sister, Lucy, cope with her sadness.

LUKE HIGHLAND
*plays the guitar* We send out a prayer to you Prudence.

RITA ELAINE BURNS
*Sung* I look from the wings, at the play you are staging, while my guitar gently weeps. As I'm sitting here doing nothing but aging, still my guitar gently weeps. *stands still as LUKE finishes the song* *She cries after it's done and she heads back to the pew next to LUCY* *LUKE HIGHLAND goes to sit next to the other Silver Beats*

Father Mackenzie
*at the pulpit yet again* Anyone else?

FINN MACARTHUR
Yes. *walks towards the organ* I know that this may seem like a private Silver Beat concert but she meant a lot to us. Also I have this to say for Rita's uncle, Prudence's twin. We're so sorry, Uncle Albert, that your sister's funeral was interrupted by that sleazy act. *starts playing the organ *sung* When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me. Speaking words of wisdom let it be. And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me. Speaking words of wisdom let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Whisper words of wisdom let it be. And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree, there will be an answer let it be. For though they may be parted, there is still a chance they'll see. There will be an answer let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Yeah, there will be an answer let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it. Whisper words of wisdom let it be.  Let it be. Let it be. Ah let it be. Yeah, let it be. Whisper words of wisdom let it be. And when the night is cloudy, there is still a light that shines on me. Shine on until tomorrow, let it be. I wake up to the sound of music. Mother Mary comes to me. Speaking words of wisdom let it be. Yeah, let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Yeah, let it be. Oh there will be an answer, let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Yeah, let it be. Oh there will be an answer, let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Ah let it be. Yeah, let it be. Whisper words of wisdom, let it be. *applause fills the church* *speaking* Thank you.

*Change of Scene*
INT. LIVERPOOL. FINN MACARTHUR'S CAR. 8:01 PM. JUNE 29th, 1967. FINN MACARTHUR, RITA ELAINE BURNS, and LUCY SILVIA DAVIS are sitting in an awkward silence. *music starts playing*

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
*sung* When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never thought I needed anybody's help in any way, but now these days are gone. I'm not so self-assured. Now I've find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors. Help me if you can I'm feeling down. *the music changes* *sung* I need a fix cause I'm going down, down to the abyss that I've left up town. I need a fix cause I'm going down. Mother Superior jumped the gun. Mother Superior jumped the gun. Mother Superior jumped the gun!  Happiness is a warm gun!  *gets a weird look from FINN and RITA, FINN has stopped the car* Bang, bang! Shoot, shoot!  *she uses her hand like it's a gun pointed to her head* Happiness is a warm, yes it is, *sustained note* gun! When I feel my finger on your trigger, I know no one can do me no harm because Happiness is a warm gun! Well don't you know that happiness is a warm gun, momma? *the music stops*

FINN MACARTHUR
All I can say to that is 'What the hell, Lucy!' What are you thinking? Life is important.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
I shouldn't exist! I was created in a lab and the concept of 'me' was probably around for ages. I yelled at Prudence for keeping me in the dark, two nights ago. Then in the morning, she died! I blame myself for it. Now, I know that I can never return to Yorkton, Maine. I can never return because of who I am. And now there's this sleaze machine that knows what who we are. I have a feeling there's going to be death on our side and I don't want you dying mainly for Rita.

FINN MACARTHUR
*music starts* *Sighs* *spoken* Look Lucy, in the end everything will work out the way it was supposed to. *sung* With a little luck, we can help it out. We can make this whole damn thing work out.

RITA ELAINE BURNS
*sung* We can work it out. We can work it out.

FINN MACARTHUR and RITA ELAINE BURNS
*sung in 2 part harmony* Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting my friend. I had always thought it was a crime, so I will ask you once again.

FINN MACARTHUR
*Sung* *the music shifts yet again* I want to help you with your problem. Stick around, I say.

RITA ELAINE BURNS
*Sung* Coming up, coming up. Yeah. Coming up!

FINN MACARTHUR
*sung* Like a flower.

RITA ELAINE BURNS
*sung* Coming up!

FINN MACARTHUR
*Sung* I say.*the music stops* *spoken* Lucy, you get the picture?

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
As close as I ever will come to getting it.

FINN MACARTHUR
Good. *starts driving his car again*

*Change of Scene*
INT. RITA ELAINE BURNS'S HOUSE. LUCY'S BEDROOM. 9:36 PM. JUNE 29th, 1967. LUCY is about to fall asleep on her bed.

LUCY SILVIA DAVIS
*sung sleepily* Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see. It's getting hard to be someone, but it all works out. It doesn't matter much to me.

*Roll Ending Credits*